Description
Order your Bank of Entitlement CD here!
Approval is GUARANTEED! All you need to do is make a successful purchase!
While traditionally, a CD (Certificate of Deposit) used to be an actual certificate that was issued, today’s CDs are almost exclusively digital… but not at Bank of Entitlement!
Here, you won’t get a digital item nor a silly paper certificate. Instead, your CD is issued on… a… CD… as in a Compact Disc. (For those that aren’t familiar, a CD allows you to save files to them, but not to be confused with the DVD that you probably are familiar with, which contains media such as movies. So yes, your CD is delivered as a physical Compact Disc.
Yes, if you really want to save files to it, you can. It’s actually a CD-R meaning recordable. What’s on it now? NOTHING! That is what you are entitled to… NOTHING!! (But of course, you’re entitled to receive the CD if you buy it!)
The front of the CD has our familiar Bank of Entitlement logo as well as the initial value of $0.00 along with your guaranteed interest rate of 3000%. Just think about how quickly your money will add up. Just multiply $0.00 by 3,000 and there’s your annual return!!
CDs usually have a maturity date that ranges from one month to (and beyond) 10 years. Decisions, decisions… not here. YOU decide when your CD matures. The way it works, when the account holder matures from their sense of entitlement, the CD matures. For most, the CD never matures, but no worries. There is no penalty for early closure of your CD.
The back of the CD, your unique account number will appear. This number is system generated to ensure it is unique to the account holder. You can look up your account on the LOGIN page. Try it out now by entering the account number 214369722 which is registered to our “CEO”, the imaginary Josh Johnson!
This imprint on the CD doesn’t stop you from being able to write data to it if you desire. It’s your CD, so you’re entitled to do whatever you want with it! (Keep it legal though!)
The Bank of Entitlement CD will arrive in a proper sized envelope for mailing and will be enclosed into a CD envelope for safekeeping.