Bank of Entitlement was founded to address the needs of the Entitlement Generation. These are the folks that expect everything to be given to them on their terms because simply put, they’re entitled!
We have developed a great line of products and services to satisfy the entitled, but as a general rule, the entitled don’t open their own accounts. Rather, the accounts are opened by the non-entitled and shared with their entitled friends and relatives. After all, why should they open their own accounts? They’re entitled!! Although, occasionally, an entitled person will open an account on their own.
Not a real financial institution, and designed for entertainment purposes only, we do sell bank-like products including credit cards valid anywhere that advertises the Bank of Entitlement symbol (nowhere), checking accounts (which come with starter checks for the account (real but invalid), and even Certificates of Deposit (but as they are known as CDs, we send out physical CDs (compact disks).
The beauty of our products is they have no cash value. The credit cards have unlimited purchasing power, but nobody accepts them. The bank accounts aren’t real, so they contain $0 at all times. And the CDs might crack eventually, but they’ll never mature.
Bottom line, the entitled are entitled to NOTHING, and anything you purchase for them will be worth nothing more than laughs.
It’s hard to make the entitled realize they are entitled to nothing, but this is a great way to let them know… to their face… or even anonymously!
Here’s a summary of our product line!
- Credit Card Accounts:
- Unique credit card accounts with exceptional benefits.
- Features include 0% interest, no payments, 100% cashback, and global discounts at participating Bank of Entitlement merchants.
- Physical cards are provided for a tangible presence, combining modern convenience with a traditional touch.
- Checking Accounts:
- Checking accounts designed for ultimate freedom.
- Offerings include $0 minimum balance, $0 to open an account, and the highest interest rates known.
- No overdraft fees and unlimited overdraft protection ensure a stress-free banking experience.
- Starter checks are included with the checking accounts.
- Unique 3000% CD (Certificate of Deposit):
- A groundbreaking CD with a futuristic twist.
- Offers an extraordinary 3000% interest rate for maximum growth.
- Delivered on an actual Compact Disc (CD), merging modern and classic elements.
- The CD matures when the bearer does, providing a personalized and flexible banking journey.
- Transparent terms and conditions ensure a clear understanding of the investment.
The overarching theme of the Bank of Entitlement is to challenge traditional norms in the financial industry, offering customers a unique and customer-centric experience. The bank combines innovation, inclusivity, and transparency to turn the conventional banking experience on its head.